When I was younger I had absolutely no self confidence. I believed all the negative thoughts in my head and added some extras for good measure.
Of course there were plenty of people along the way to support those thoughts. There were plenty of positive people in my life as well and my parents were always supportive, but let's face it...we usually let the negative outweigh the positive. So that's what I heard the most.
This continued for years. It made everything in life a little more difficult. From applying for a job to actually taking a job, to walking into a room and being able to talk to people.
Somewhere in the middle of all this I met my husband and we went on to have kids and get married.
When I was about 30 years old, we were invited to church. Since I wasn't raised in church, it wasn't the best experience. I couldn't understand anything the pastor was saying. If it hadn't been for a wonderful woman God placed in my life, I probably would not have gone back. She had tons of patience and took her time showing me how to look up scripture, explaining God/Jesus to me, showing me how to pray,.....
During this time I read the book, "Battlefield of the Mind" by Joyce Meyer. That book changed my life!
I don't have it now to get the actual quote, but she basically said that the devil starts on us when we are younger, he knows where to get us, and we grow up believing all his lies.
I remember being so angry! I cried and cried thinking of how cheated I had been all those years. All that time I was hearing negativity, I thought those words were coming from Gods mouth to my ears. I thought He hated me. So to find out how far from the truth I was and to see all I'd been cheated of was a total game changer in my life.
I made the decision to find my confidence once and for all!!!!
"So we say with confidence, 'The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?'” (NIV)
Trust only God for all your needs.
Please know that while I share these steps I took towards gaining confidence, and you will hear me say I throughout, I am in no way taking credit for what God has done in my life. There is no way I would be where I am without Him. God took me every step of the way and He gets all the glory.
Steps I took to finally find my confidence:
1) I stepped out of my comfort zone as often as I could and I still do. As long as it's in alignment with God, me, & my likes and dislike.
2) Anytime a negative thought hit my ears, I would remind myself that God would never talk to me that way and therefore, it was not my truth.
3) I prayed all the time and asked God to help me see myself only as He saw me.
4) Anytime a thought from my past popped into my mind to make me feel bad (negative memories or things I'm not proud of) I would remind myself that I am not that person anymore. I would ask God to remove it from my thoughts so that I can move on.
5) I surrounded myself with positive people, books, and anything else that was good for me. I let go of the negative.
6) I set goals for myself. Nothing major, just baby step goals. I thought about where I wanted to be and then, thought backwards on how/where to start.
I still use these tools. While my confidence is so much better now, and I am a different person, the devil still sneaks in there once in a while and I immediately go to God in prayer.
When God called me to start sharing my story and lead other ladies through Life Coaching, it was terrifying and I realized that some of that negativity was still there. But I know what to do so I just continued with my steps and kept right on moving forward because at the end of the day, you do what God says. Life Coaching is an incredible blessing in my life and I'm so glad I listened.
So, what do you typically do when the negativity sets in?
How can you change things from this point on?
I'm here to listen so email me or comment below.
Know someone that needs to hear this? Share it with them!
Have a fabulous week and take care of you!